Suicide doesn’t just take one life

Suicide doesn’t just take one life, it sends shockwaves through everyone affected, writes Caroline Roodhouse.

This was painfully clear during a shift volunteering on the support line for Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (SoBS).

The call was from a grandmother, and it wasn’t her bereavement that brought her to the phone.

Her granddaughter, a woman in her 20s, had found her best friend after she took her own life.

The grandmother spoke of feeling utterly helpless. She couldn’t bear seeing her granddaughter in such distress and had no idea how to support her through something so traumatic and devastating.

What struck me was how heavy her sense of responsibility felt and the deep love and worry of someone watching a young person she cared about suffer, while feeling powerless to make things better. She kept saying, ‘I just want to help her, but I don’t know how.’

This is something we don’t talk about enough: suicide bereavement doesn’t only affect those directly grieving, but also the people desperately trying to support them.

After listening, we talked about what SoBS can offer, not only for people bereaved by suicide themselves, but also guidance and reassurance for those supporting someone they love. There was a noticeable shift in her voice when she realised there were things she could do. That she didn’t have to stand by helplessly. That support existed for everyone involved.

She ended the call relieved, not because the pain had gone, but because she now had options, understanding, and somewhere to turn.